Sometimes people turn up out of the blue. Years on, they find you on Google - or fall over you in Waitrose or somewhere else that you wouldn't expect to see them. Sometimes it's a nice surprise - and sometimes it isn't.People do terrible things to other people, and never realise what damage they've done, and what anger and pain their actions have inflicted on their victims - and many of them underestimate how long that anger and pain can remain alive, simmering away under the surface, waiting to be expressed.
Such people tend to greet or write to their victims as though nothing has happened. They sign their messages 'with love'. They ask people if they might perhaps like to go for a drink. They slap people on the back, their cheerful faces totally forgetful of the past, and wholly concentrated on the present.
If by chance you get an e-mail or a letter or meet someone, and you have something to say - something that's been simmering away for months or years - then it's better to say it than to bite your tongue and go along with a 'let's let bygones be bygones' attitude.
Suppressed anger never did anybody any good. I had to write a very unpleasant e-mail today. I didn't enjoy writing it. Actually, I didn't want to write it. But I feel a lot better from having written it.
If you get the chance, get your anger off your chest, and speak your mind. Then you can forget about it all and move on.
Emily - http://www.therapypartnership.com
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